Int. Fox SideKicks Studio- Morning
PEEVE DORKY, late 30’s brown nosed host and CANNA COOTY, late 30’s critical host. are getting ready for the morning segment.
PRODUCER:Okay everyone we are going live in 5 minutes!
CANNA: Oh Jesus where is our special contributor Tracey Bash?
PEEVE:Oh there she is!
Enters TRACEY BASH, a stuck up and sassy D-list actress who is now a recurring contributor for the network. Bash is best known for her only role in the one hit wonder film “Without A Clue.”
PEEVE:Tracey welcome back! You look stunning as ever! We are so thrilled for having you on the show once again.
CANNA:Alright so Tracey we have a great show lined up this morning. Were gonn-
TRACEY:(Interrupts)Ah no I don’t think so I just found out some very tragic news! The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences are thinking about cancelling the Oscars this year!
CANNA:Oh my god no! This can’t be true! Where did you hear this?!
TRACEY: Just my source. One of my special “friends” from the academy…Anyway they might cancel because of this ridiculous and ludicrous #oscarssowhite boycott. Black stars are saying that it’s not a lot of diversity when it comes to the Oscars. They think it’s mostly dominated by white males. And that they are not recognizing black history month. How can they say that?! I’m appalled. This is why negative things always happen to us, because we think negative thoughts. We have got a lot of great things from this great nation. And they are never satisfied. This is all just ludicrous!
PEEVE:We can’t let this happen! We have to do something!
CANNA: Peeve’s right! Oscars can’t cancel! I have to find out if DiCaprio is gonna win this year!
TRACEY:Don’t worry I have a plan and I’m going to present it on today’s show.
CANNA: We about to go live in a few minutes, tell us real quick!
TRACEY: (pulls out her phone to show them )Since they don’t think the Oscars is very diverse and ignoring black history month. We going to show the world (temporarily) that there is diversity for black history month.
Peeve and Canna look at her phone with anticipation.
PEEVE: (Shocked)Are you crazy?! We can’t put that up!
CANNA: Why not? It’s February and were presenting that it’s black history month. You don’t want the Oscars cancelled do you? Or are for supporting this boycott?
PEEVE: (laughs)Oh god no. I just don’t know if we should put this up. We know we don’t care about black history month but..And if you are gonna put this up aren’t there black inventors and shit? Shouldn’t you at least put it on here? Tracey if you present this, you might get suspended again.
TRACEY: Why would I get suspended again? We are going to show the world that we recognize “Black History Month.” So Black History is in the shortest month of the year and the biggest events in entertainment history is also in February, big deal. Black people should be grateful. No other race has a month devoted to their history. I told you black people have to make up their minds. Do they want to be segregated? or integrated? And as for the Oscars go, maybe if we stop making movies like “Straight out of the hood” or whatever. You know who wants to see gang bangers threatening society with disgraceful music?
CANNA: Oh god I know.
TRACEY: (continues)And with the Oscars, black stars won a few awards for movies in the past like “5 Years a Slave” and he wasn’t a slave for the long. And the movie about Martin Luther King. I mean I know he’s done a lot, but he is so overrated. And Hollywood is run by white liberals who had our President O-
CANNA: (holding her stomach)Oh please do not mention his name, I’m gonna get sick.
TRACEY:(continues)Our President is supported by white liberals in Hollywood. A president should win not by the color of his skin, but by his skills. It’s kind of like all the black award shows when you only get an award if your black.
PEEVE: You said it Tracey.
CANNA: Yea what the hell let’s run this!
PRODUCER: Alright places everyone! Were going live in 5,4,3,2…1.
Happy Black History Month from Tracey Bash!!!